Negative

They arrived at the fair, or the site where the fair had been, only to find it had gone.
A poster fluttered past them in the breeze with yesterday's date emblazoned across it in huge letters and numbers.

Positive

"Can we go to the fair tonight, dad?"
"Yes."

Is There Anybody Out There?

He sat in a chair in his garden with the telescope on its stand in front of him.
He watched the sky every night, hoping that they would eventually come for him. He had been on this planet for 40 years and he was starting to think they'd abandoned him.
A bright light in the dark sky started to grow even brighter.

Hospital

She sat upright in bed, waiting for the nurses to bring her pills for the day.
Two nurses entered the room with a trolley and began giving out little cups of coloured pills and cups of water to those in the other beds.
They passed her bed without stopping.
"What about me?" she asked.
"You haven't settled your bill for yesterday," said one of the nurses.
The woman cried. The hospital had taken everything from her.

Swimming

He did 50 lengths of the pool every single morning. An early start was needed to ensure he got a full lane to himself.
This morning he'd overslept and the leisure centre was much busier. The pool was full of people who didn't take swimming as seriously as he did.
He needed a way to get all of these fair weather swimmers out of his way. A light bulb lit above his head.
He stood next to the deep end of the pool and shouted: "LOOK AT ME!"
He pulled down his trunks and strained as he shat out a turd on to the tiles.
He picked it up and held it aloft like a trophy, before throwing it into the pool.
All the swimmers panicked and made their way to the edge before climbing out and heading for the changing rooms.
He dived in, a personal best needing to be beaten.

Pride

The trucks drove slowly down the street, each one playing deafeningly loud music and with a bunch of near naked men dancing enthusiastically on the back.
The crowd cheered.
Most of them did anyway. But there was always a bad element at these events who wanted to spoil it.
"Where's our straight pride?" yelled one of the neanderthals. "This is descrimination!"
The knuckle draggers were as surprised as anyone when the men in the tiny leather shorts on the float which was blasting out I Will Survive produced flamethrowers with which to silence them.

Evangelical

"We'd like to talk to you about our Lord and Saviour..."
"Wait a minute. I'm not interested in Jesus Christ, God or any of those other guys."
He wished he'd not bothered to stop watching the old cowboy film when he'd heard the knock at the door. Nobody called around in the middle of the day unless they were religious nutters or wanted your money.
"Who?" asked one of the women.
"God? Jesus? That's why you're here, isn't it?"
The two women looked at each other.
"We've never heard of either of them," said one of them.
The other peeled the skin from her face, revealing a green reptilian face beneath it.