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Tuesday 28 February 2017

Business

The room was full of powerful-looking people in expensive suits. Anyone who walked by the building would think that a very important meeting was taking place, perhaps discussing multi-national takeover deals and such things.
This couldn't be further from the truth.
The TV was concealed from the street and they all sat there awaiting the DNA test to see if some baseball cap-wearing boy was the father of the tracksuit-wearing girl's baby.


Monday 27 February 2017

End of the Line

The train didn't usually approach the terminus with such speed. There was no screeching of brakes and the buildings flickered past much faster than usual.
The impact crumpled the front half of the locomotive as the buffers were flattened and the bricks and concrete of the platform were carved up.
Unsuspecting daytrippers fled as the train came to rest right outside the coffee shop.
The baristas inside seemed as disinterested as usual.


Sunday 26 February 2017

Spider

The upturned glass stood in the middle of the kitchen lino. The spider sat beneath it, trapped and helpless.
The woman who had put the glass there left the room, unable to look at it. Her flatmate could sort it out when she got home.
Once the coast was clear the spider lifted up the glass and crawled from underneath. It headed for the living room where it would scare the woman one more time.


Saturday 25 February 2017

Six Pack

The first beer was cracked open and he downed the lot in one go.
The second didn't last much longer.
Cans number three and four were consumed a little more leisurely, each taking ten minutes.
The fifth took fifteen minutes and the final one was drained in under a minute, having caught his second wind.
He burped and went back to the shop for more.


Friday 24 February 2017

Damaged

The shopworkers didn't care for the company for which they worked, as the company didn't care much for them. The working conditions were poor and the wages poorer.
They found a way to pass the time and get one over on their bosses.
They walked around the warehouse kicking boxes as hard as they could and causing as much damage to stock as possible. That would show them.


Loose Nut

She rode her bike down the hill, lifting her feet from the pedals and laughing as they span wildly.
She had it all under control until she hit the pothole and the front wheel detached itself from the forks.
The wheel rolled in to the side of the road as she was thrown over the handlebars, her teeth breaking her fall.


Wednesday 22 February 2017

Police Story

He was assaulted, jumped from behind and hit over the head with something heavy. The perpetrator took his wallet and his wedding ring. Not his phone though.
He rang the police. Someone would be there shortly, he was told.
Nobody came as he sat by the roadside. He waited almost an hour before he gave up and went home. At least the guy hadn't taken his keys.
The cops were doubtlessly sitting somewhere drinking coffee and eating doughnuts, the pieces of shit, he thought.


Tuesday 21 February 2017

My War

He'd been hiding in the bunker for so long he couldn't remember how many days it had been.
He was alone and there was enough food to last him for weeks, maybe months if necessary.
He had fashioned a bed in the corner and he was warm. Time passed slowly and he daren't venture out of the bunker.
Outside the war was over, but nobody had told him.

Everything Went Black

They needed a break. Nothing was going right, but they would have to work until it was fixed.
One of them had an idea and sneaked away. He returned, smiling ten minutes later.
Before anyone could ask him what was going on the power went and they were plunged into darkness, saved for now from the task at hand.

Sunday 19 February 2017

TV Party

He sat with the table next to his armchair creaking under the weight of snack foods and carbonated beverages.
He had a plate full of hotdogs on his lap, all in buns and all doused in high levels of ketchup and weak mustard.
The mega-TV was turned up as loud as it could go and he was going to enjoy the sporting event of the decade.
He'd dropped his hotdogs and kicked over the table before it started thanks to a massive heart attack.


Saturday 18 February 2017

Mobiles

He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. Nowadays there was no hiding. He could ignore it, but they'd only keep trying. He couldn't even lie about where he was thanks to GPS grassing him up if he did.
He pulled the phone from his pocket and threw it in the lake.
"GPS that, you sons of bitches," he shrieked.


Friday 17 February 2017

Ship

They had been at sea for weeks, living in cramped conditions. There had been little food and no chance to wash.
But now their journey was nearing its end. Land loomed into view, growing closer and closer.
There were so many of them on deck, excited that their new lives could now begin.

Thursday 16 February 2017

Eartha

She had raced into the bathroom, growing a tail, touching cloth, having the turtle's head.
Trousers and knickers were wrenched down as she hoped to be seated before proceedings began.
A loud fart echoed in the porcelain bowl followed by the rapid machine gun fire of a slack-boweled deposit.
She knew it wasn't good, but the relief was immense.
It was over as quickly as it started.
Just as she prepared to wipe it resumed, all water.
Stop, start, stop, start. The kids had never been dropped off at the pool so many times.
Today was going to be spent no more than twenty feet from a toilet at any time.


Wednesday 15 February 2017

Border

The wall hadn't been there the last time they'd crossed the border.
The last time it was only a tiny sign by the roadside that told them they'd entered another country - blink and you'd have missed it.
Now there was a queue of vehicles that stretched back as far as the eye could see as officials waited for motorists to present their passports and papers.
How had it come to this?


Tuesday 14 February 2017

Meeting

"I'm here," he said into the intercom.
There was a buzzing sound as the door opened.
He entered and began to climb the stairs.
Once at the top he rapped on the mahogany door.
The gunfire which splintered the wood from the other side of the door and tore a huge cavity in his stomach came as a surprise.


Monday 13 February 2017

Purchase

Sometimes people buy things they want.
Sometimes they aren't aware they even want them, but curiosity intervenes.
This is one of those times.
Click or tap on the link below, you know you want to.

Hospital

In this place again.
I hope the food's better than last time.
Judging by the look on the doctor's face I won't be here too long.
Shit.

Saturday 11 February 2017

Wages

It was payday and his wages hadn't gone into his account.
"This is total bullshit," he raged and got straight on the phone to human resources.
"I haven't been paid," he yelled as soon as it was picked up at the other end.
Those in the office with him could only hear one side of the conversation.
"Oh, I see. That's OK then."
He put the phone down carefully and turned to the others, red-faced.
"You all knew I'd got the day wrong, didn't you?"


Relaxation

The dog raced into the bedroom. The door downstairs must have been slightly ajar. Or he'd learned how to open it using the handle.
"Hello boy," she said as the dog bounded on to the bed, tail wagging like an upturned pendulum.
He pawed at the duvet a little and then curled up at the bottom of the bed and went to sleep, the bed more important than the human company.


Thursday 9 February 2017

The One With the Title That's Gratuitously Long and Contains More Words Than the Actual Story Itself

It was just an ordinary day.
Nothing happened.

Day Off

It was her first day off in over three weeks and she intended to sleep late, very late. This was good as she'd put away enough wine to sink a battleship after work.
The phone ringing woke her from her near-unconscious slumber.
"Hello?"
She sounded groggy and she blinked rapildly in an attempt to make everything look less blurry. Her head was pounding and she felt sick.
"Where are you?"
It was her boss.
"In bed."
"And were you thinking of coming in today at all?"
She could see the clock. It was 10am. So much for the super-long lie in.
"Not really. It's my day off, remember?"
"No, that was yesterday."


Tuesday 7 February 2017

There's No Such Thing as a Free Lunch

"I'll be having a free pizza."
"Sir, we don't serve free pizza. We're a business, we only sell it."
"Is that so?"
He pulled out a shotgun and pointed it at the assistant.
"What topping would you like?"
The pizza was prepared as he continued to point the weapon at the assistant.
The pizza was cooked and then given to the man who sat down in the shop to eat it. He was on his seventh slice by the time the police arrived.

When the Moon Hits Your Eye

"I've got no control."
"Switch to manual."
"I have."
"Let me try."
The two astronauts wrestled with the controls, but the small vessel was not for controlling. It weaved this way and that with seemingly one destination in mind.
The small moon was becoming much larger.
Their speed was off the scale and there was no way to slow it down.
They braced themselves.


Sunday 5 February 2017

Last Day

He didn't know it was going to be unlike any other day when he got up. If he had he might have done things a bit differently.
But then it was probably fate and there was nothing he could do to stop it.
The newspaper crashed to the mat in the hall and he retrieved it. It was then that he saw the shocking news.


Saturday 4 February 2017

Ace

The dealer turned over the second card. That gave him 17.
Adrenaline raced through the lone player's body as his 19 won him £200. He was on quite a roll this evening, several grand ahead. He knew he should probably quit while he was doing so well, but he was certain he could squeeze more money out of the casino. It made a nice change.
He moved £500 of chips into position.
"Sir, that exceeds the table limit," said the dealer.
"Then raise the limit."
The dealer's supervisor - not a pit boss in such a shithole - appeared.
"Is there a problem?"
"Yes, I want to bet £500 and apparently it's too much."
"That's correct."
"Can't you raise the limit?"
"No."
He raked his chips towards him and stood.
"Where do you think you're going?" asked the supervisor.
"If you won't take my bet I'm leaving."
"That won't be possible."
The supervisor signalled to the two gorilla-like bouncers who dragged the man into a back room, ready to give their fists a workout.



Friday 3 February 2017

Passive-Aggressive

"What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
Clearly a lie.
"Really?"
"Yes, really."
Another lie.
"Do you want to go out?"
"No."
This was also a lie.
He didn't like the way his dog talked to him.


Thursday 2 February 2017

Free

He looked up at the sky. The lone gull flew high above him and he was jealous of it. The gull had it all, he thought. It had total freedom and the view up there must be amazing.
The gull looked down at the man. It was jealous of his chips.


Wednesday 1 February 2017

Problems

He'd wracked his brains for half an hour. Or was it racked? This now distracted him from what was at hand.
The problem on the page in front of him.
There had to be an obvious way to solve it, but it currently seemed far beyond his mental capabilities.
And anyway, why did it matter how many apples John had and who he shared them with?